While I have traditionally heard this word being used to refer to a reversion to former relationships which were generally unhealthy, I think it also has application in the realm of spiritual practice. We tend to want to see things in a consistent manner for it to be true and for us to feel comfort and security we want change to be minimized. However that is not the way it actually works or anything in the world works. Change as they say is the only constant

So many times I have made what felt like powerful progress. And experience so strong and so intense my heart so full of gratitude and love that I can never imagine feeling anything different. And then… There is change. The bliss ends and the demands of the secular life sink in. This is a natural course of events and we should not be disheartened by them.

Personally, my “backslides” come in one of two forms. First, the less surprising one, is to start feeling down about something and then doubt creeps into your mind and causes you to revert a.k.a. backslide into a comfort zone. Fear of change for any reason can cause one to retreat into the familiar, even if it is not facilitating your growth, development or connection to the divine.

The second more unfortunate and more shocking times the backsliding can happen is within a time of hubris. You’ve been in tune with the universe for a certain amount of time or you’ve experienced positivity, perhaps seeing the progress you’ve made and feel proud. With pride, you look upon what you have gone through, and then become attached to it as if it were an end and permanent result. And that is the great KOAN (a paradox to be meditated upon and cause one to gain sudden insight) to help us actualize enlightenment in spiritual life. The process will never end. It will always ebb and flow and you must detach from expectations of permanence. Enjoy the moment let it go and enjoy it all experiences that come to you without fear of loss when it ends.

“There is no fear for one whose heart is not filled with desires.”

Buddha

Most recently, I had a fairly sustained level of positive happy light energy and I was able to extend that into every aspect of my life. I felt like I had accomplished it, and I’d done all the work I needed to do I can now move on into a new stage in my life. I was now happy and could stay that way. As we all know it is impossible to stay happy just as it is impossible to stay in any emotion for the rest of your life. Emotions come and go and you half to be conscious of this, feel the emotions and allow it to pass. Having no expectations and no attachments to those emotions which allows for acceptance and calms stress.

Emotions are impermanent, they will come and go. Buddhists teachings encourage us to “be friends with our emotions.” Meaning, hang out with them… spend time with them, learn more about them, and then, when it is time to go, say goodbye.

With this perspective we learn that we must not allow our emotions to cloud our mind, or block us from our growth. We can feel difficult emotions and not allow them to drag us back to those comfort zones we fought so hard to free ourselves from. Having emotions, or feeling emotions does not mean that we are not on the right track. Really, the term is misleading. Even times when from our paradigm, we seem to moving backwards, it is all part of the process of evolving. “Backsliding” into our comfort zones or habits really is the reflection of the ebb and flow of life that will always be. Rather than thinking of it as “wasting time,” or “going backwards,” the reality is it is all part of our journey and provides us opportunities to become stronger and clearer. Approaching situations we would typically label as “backsliding” with a new paradigm will allow us to maintain our direction and focus without getting down on ourselves or feeling we are some how regressing.

What aspects of your life would you have labeled as backsliding? How can you re-frame your perspective on it? How can you view times like these as helpful for your growth, rather than harmful?

Action and reaction, ebb and flow, trial and error, change- this is the rhythm of living. Out of our over-confidence, fear; out of our fear, clearer vision, fresh hope. And out of hope, progress.

Bruce Barton